Beauty

Beauty is subjective. What you consider beautiful may be ugly to another.

Advertisements play a key role in influencing our concept of beauty. Beauty is how we see it, as the saying goes – ‘beauty is in the eyes of the beholder’. Aggressive promotional tactics are used to shape people’s expectations as well as revolutionize accepted levels of styles, quality and glamour. Over time they have managed to develop these unrealistic expectations to such a degree that make conceited men and women the world over demand beauty as a basic human right. And the so called beauty which many people seek is external rather than internal. External good looks are what they look for when selecting friends or when choosing a life partner.

Because of the high premium being placed on good looks, people try various methods to achieve this desirable state. It could mean going for aerobics, an intensive sliming course, a face lift, wearing fashionable clothes, a new hairdo, or makeup. Usually, ladies and also some men, tend to be very conscious and particular about their weight when they discover that they have put on a few extra pounds.

While males are not exempt from this fade, it is generally true to say that the fairer sex will go to great length to look and feel beautiful. The womenfolk in modern society spend a good part of their income on expensive clothes and cosmetics. Their choice of what to buy is heavily influenced and dictated by the expensive promotional gimmicks adopted by fashion houses and cosmetic companies.

It is indeed surprising how profoundly women are interested in clothes. For example, if a man and a woman meet another man and a woman on the street, the woman seldom looks at the other man: she usually looks to see how well the other woman is dressed.

Despite all their seriousness in the search for beauty, people have forgotten to use a source everyone is endowed with by nature but not often used. They miss out on this natural source of beauty.

Maybe this source has easily been overlooked because present day cosmetics provide a convenient substitute to give an instant though false conception of real beauty. In this age of fast foods and all sorts of instant this and instant that many women resort to instant beauty aids and cosmetics which are readily available in the market. Now coming back to our natural source of beauty, we like to ask: what can this source of beauty be? None other than kindness, love, simplicity and the beauty of the heart. Of all the cosmetics available, the best is loving kindness. It is natural, inexpensive and always effective. The one who has this quality looks beautiful even without having to worry about what is applied on the face or done to the hair.

Even if one is born with plain looks, one can look radiant and attractive if the virtues of love, kindness and patience are cultivated. These virtues will give rise to an internal charm that will radiate outwards, making that person irresistible. Many people will be attracted to him or her because of that special charm as beauty naturally exudes from the person’s body.

Unlike external physical beauty which fades like a flower, this internal beauty has an aura of charm which can often become more intense in its glow the more mature the person becomes.

On the other hand, even if a person is born handsome and with beautiful features, many people will be turned away from such a person if he or she is jealous, selfish, cunning and conceited. But if the person is overflowing with loving-kindness, speaks gently and politely, he or she will be far more attractive than the so-called beautiful person who is conceited and full of pride. A beautiful complexion can attract attention, but for how long? There is no complexion which can remain beautiful especially if the person’s mind is corrupted. External beauty will fade like all things must. The saying that ‘beauty is but skin deep’ is indeed very true. But the beauty of loving kindness remains, and is appreciated by all alike.

The world is like a mirror. If we look at the mirror with a smiling face, we will see a face smiling back at us. But if we look at it with a frown or a face of anger, we will also see the same ugly face reflected back.
In sympathy, the same good qualities will be returned to us. And when we perform noble virtues which arise in the heart, they will be translated into good speech and deeds which are apparent to all.

If one is born good looking, one should consider oneself to be fortunate. To be born beautiful or handsome is a blessing according to the Buddha. But one should not, on account of that beauty, develop arrogance or conceit. It will only make such a person repulsive to others. Not only will that conceit work against a person’s appearance, but more importantly, it will be an obstacle to one’s spiritual progress and happiness.

Ray Mancini